"You're wishin' too much, baby. You gotta stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone oughta be.”
-

just met up with hazel and des to decide where we are going to spend our first few "homeless" nights in sweden. sigh. i wish m.y. was going with me too. i've grown used to travelling with her and do, at least we have the same tastes and everything.

i really hope i won't see him again, at least for another year. realised that i'm not strong enough, though time and time again i've tried. everytime i think i've succeeded, it proved to be an illusion as something as small as a glance is able to send my wall crumbling down each time. i'm really sick of all these emo blog posts too. why can't i just stop. why why why.

7 days.

just two days ago i started packing, bit by bit. into the luggage went my winter clothes first. then went my accessories. the rest have yet to be packed. my parents were watching me pack, and i already started missing them, not being able to see them for the next 6 months. plus my friends. my closest friends who are not following me this time. and all my other friends. hmm. i dunno. i've been so emotional these days, and it's not even pms-time yet! HAHA. dunno how i'm going to survive there. i really hope i don't get homesick, which i think is highly likely because i already feel abit homesick the past few :( after last night, i was abit more eager to leave. leave this mess behind. this mess which has been rotting for the past one and half years. it's time to make a clean break. this is the chance for my great escape.

okay, maybe "eager" is not the right word. somehow, i don't feel excited at all. more like... i guess flying off is the only option i have to happiness.



there's something about december which is just different from the rest of the year. everyone is joyful and merry-making, celebrating the end of a good year. it's the season of giving, of showing love and appreciation to the ones you care about. shops are playing happy christmas songs. orchard is lit up beautifully in a myriad of colours- even the hanging lights laugh and twinkle in the wind.

even without these commercialised differences, somehow december is just as different. for one, the air is fresher, lighter. also, unlike the harsh june sun, december sun is gentle, it bathes the earth in broad strokes of golden hues. the atmosphere in general just feels so peaceful and joyous. maybe it's the angels and whole earth rejoicing about the birth of our King. i just love this month (:


went winter-shopping with manda at the newly opened 313 today. there was a uniqlo opening sale today (which we recce-ed for yesterday), but boy, little did we expect the queues to be so horrendously long.

we queued up for half an hour just to enter the shop, and then, probably another one and a half hour to make payment. the queue snaked around the entire store twice, which is a rather good marketing strategy come to think of it. like, you're looking around because you're so bored while stuck in the line, then, you realised the top on your right actually looks pretty nice, and the jacket on your left is on discount! i think that probably explains why everyone goes out of uniqlo with bags and bags of stuff. i mean, queue for so long... might as well buy more right? haha.

i feel so lost shopping for winter clothes :( technically i have everything i need at home already. just that they are dumpy and ugly. well i have nice ones too but my dad insists on me bringing the ugly ones to sweden because they are the ones which are warmer. plus the luggage limit means i have to divide and allocate my clothing space between winter and spring. so many constraints! unlike packing for usa last summer which was just throwing a few tops into my suitcase, cos' us stuff is so cheap i was planning to buy everything there. oh well, there's still one more month to sort everything out!