"You're wishin' too much, baby. You gotta stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone oughta be.”
-

It WILL happen!

The little thought that "it won't" is always nagging at the back of my mind, and everytime I consciously think of it I feel like hyperventilating. Seriously! I'm really worried that we can't do it in time. And once we start, we can't stop till we reach the end. Just so scared it crashes and burns halfway. We'll have so many people to answer to.

You know something I realised recently? I'm past the age when I say "In the future, I'm going to do this..." There's no more "in the future" for me (well not considering the obvious things I can't do now, like erm, retiring?). Mostly, life is just here and now. Meiying and I wanted to organise an OCIP, and here we are organising it. If I want to set up a business, I'm gonna have set it up. If I want to go on exchange, I'm gonna have to apply for it and go. This is the time. I think it's more scary than empowering because we've reached the age where we have to face up to reality. We can't hide behind our youth anymore, to promise things we don't mean, just because we can't do it yet. For example, since secondary school, I always said that I would go on exchange, but I just said it without thinking much because I knew I didn't have to, not until now. With only 3 more years left in uni, I have to decide whether or not I should go. The reason why I'm hesitating is because most of the programs in my school only allow 1 or 2 students to go to a particular uni at a time, and I'm too scaredy to go to a whole new country all by myself. This is the reality - for many things, it's now or never, and we don't have much time to think anymore.