"You're wishin' too much, baby. You gotta stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone oughta be.”
-

OMG my daddy is hip!

He has a facebook account. He has quite a lot of friends. He writes on his friends' walls. He pokes. He's in a few groups. And he's uploaded an album of photos. And it means his friends are hip too because they also have facebook!

When I grow old and something else the equivalent of facebook starts getting popular, I don't think I'll bother to learn using it, too lazy haha. I'm sooooo impressed by the older generation these days! (:


A few days ago, I was told by a friend that I always seemed to be so busy, that I never had time for meet-ups. It's true. Ever since I returned from USA, I haven't even had a proper meet-up with even my dear sec school clique yet. Though I saw Ming once, that's only cos Joanne was flying off to Hongkong to study and we were having a farewell lunch with her. Haven't seen the rest yet. I can't believe it myself.

Guess this is like a wake-up call for me... some of my friends used to be the one who was always initiating the gatherings, and I would be the one to say, no, I can't, I've something on, I'm busy blah blah. They won't do this forever, sometimes they'll get tired, and stop. Then what? I've been taking my friends for granted, thinking they'll always be there.

I had many close friends from secondary school -Madie, Emmeline, Genevieve etc. But somehow, we all went our separate ways, to different JCs, to different classes, and I guess we never really bothered to keep in touch. By and by, we started seeing and talking to each other less, drifting apart until even suggesting a meetup would be strange. And these are friends whom you know you can still connect with, after all this time... it's just that, after the prolonged period of separation, it's just weird and awkward to suddenly want to meet up again.

I really don't want any more of this to happen to any more of my friends! So... as soon as my mid-term on tuesday is over, I'll start arranging meet-ups and give all my friends their due attention.

Love you guys! (:


I still cannot look, I still cannot breathe, my heart still races.

I guess it's something like smoking, drugs, suicide or any other vice. You can quit or cure yourself of it, but it's never really gone, because you just have to try it once, for the possibility of it to be hovering there for the rest of your life. Because you know it's so easy to turn around, to fall back into its dark embrace.


I don't know why everyone says MS is so easy. It's killing me. Like seriously. KILLINGGGGGGGMEEEEEE!!

Rawr.

And I thought that Stats B was the end of all Stats-like subjects. There's still MS(Management Science), CAT (Computer Analytical Skills), Finance blah blah blah.

Why am I doing Business?

I should totally study some obsure artsy subject where I'll never have to deal with maths/excel ever again.

Like maybe Philosophy. Or law. Or music. Or drop out of school to be a figure skater or something.

Don't know how I'm gonna survive the rest of the term.

I need a stress ball to squeeze!


I wake up on Tuesdays already looking forward to the end of the day.

Gosh I really hate the lessons today.

I will never ever bid for cheap Profs again :(

9 hours and 15 mins to the end of lessons!


Yes it's Friday tomorrow! That means no lessons! I'll be going to school anyway to blade and I can't wait to see everyone!

And then after that it's a Work & Travel gathering at Aranda. Pretty excited for that too because it means seeing people whom I've been living and working with for the past three months! Plus we're planning a few surprises for tomorrow ;)

Dinner at Manhattan with Manda and Dorene today after our presentations. I just received an email about my MPW presentation and I'm surprised to see how many people commented that I smile A LOT during my presentation(in a good way). And I didn't even realise I smile so much. It's so weird. Just goes to show the extent to which you do certain things without even knowing. But oh well, if it's good...

Can you believe what I just signed up for?! To be part of a student research team for the ministerial forum with the Minister of Manpower! I don't know what came over me, and it's purely intuition this time. I just felt like I ought to do it. Hope my application gets through. Hope I'll be competent enough. And I really really hope there's no interview! Because I'll be just embarassing myself if they ask me current affair questions.

I pretty much got my year planned out. I shall try my very best to organise an OCIP trip this year with Mei, even though it's gonna be really rushed. And, I decided I'm not going to be in my SMU's modern dance club anymore, because I can't/don't want to commit. Even though I faltered slightly when Kennedy tried to persuade me against it for a whole half an hour today, I still don't think I'll continue. Shall do lyrical jazz instead, which I think I'll enjoy more and which is only an hour a week.

Btw, I so love salsa! It's so fun, especially when you have fun people to dance with!

Moments.

If I were able to live my life again, next time I would try to make more mistakes. I would not try to be so perfect. I would be more relaxed. I would be much more foolish than I have been.

In fact, I would take very few things seriously. I would be much less sanitary. I would run more risks. I would take more trips I would contemplate more sunsets, I would climb more mountains, I would swim more rivers. I would go to more places I have never visited. I would eat more ice cream and fewer beans. I would have more real problems, fewer imaginary ones. I was one of these people who lived prudently and prolifically every moment of his life. Certainly I had moments of great happiness; (but, if I could go back I'll try to have only good moments, because that's what life is made of, just moments.)

Don’t let the present slip away. I was one of those who never went anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, an umbrella, and a parachute. If I could live over again, I would go barefoot, beginning in early spring and would continue so until the end of autumn. I would take more turns on the merry-go-round. I would watch more dawns. And play with more children, if I once again had a life ahead of me.

But, you see, I am eighty-five and I know that I am dying.

Jorge Luis Borges, translated by Alastair Reid

A life full of dilemmas.

Is it just me? Because every decision seems so friggin hard.

I have to exhale and force my thumb down to send those sms-es.

And my heart sinks a little each time I see "Sent".

They say the hardest decision is often the right one.

But how do you really know?

What I'm afraid is, the seemingly hard path I've taken is actually just a cowardly me seeking the easy way out.