SPARKLE. & FADE.

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"You're wishin' too much, baby. You gotta stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone oughta be.”
-

yun
2 march ats smss ajc smu
dance smiles like these

12:55 PM, Tuesday, February 28, 2006

light of the world,
You stepped down into darkness.
opened my eyes
let me see.

don't know who to pity more.

2:11 PM, Sunday, February 26, 2006

had lunch with the dancers after practice today, then went to film stuff with yizhen meiyee and siewhoon. super tiring. we went to bugis, then walked to sim lim square, then walked back to bugis because i needed to get new dance shoes, then walked to arab street, then istana park. all the while carrying a total of thirteen bamboo umbrellas in our arms. phew! and we didn't even get much filming done. but at least it was fun. next week we're prolly going to film at botanic gardens and town.

2:00 PM, Thursday, February 23, 2006

waiting for my hair to dry so i can go to sleep. lie on my pillow and shut my eyes. squeeze them shut them tight and keep everything out. anything everything, everything out.

guess what? i actually dreamt of her yesterday, it was a continuation of the dream i had the night before. but it's not a very good thing to be in my dreams.

such fair cruelty.

all i do each night is hope that tomorrow comes quick.

5:34 AM, Monday, February 20, 2006

samson and delilah.

if i could kill you with words i would.

4:16 PM, Saturday, February 18, 2006

unluck.

this week has been awful. somehow it seems to be dragging on and on and on. been aching continuously because of dance monday wednesday friday saturday, no help that afternoon pe on tuesday was a killer. plus i think i hurt my knees and back and neck when doing cartwheels. my knees are super painful, old problem came back probably because i kept landing wrongly during the jumps, and could positively feel them grinding against each other. yikes. seriously i think all the cushioning in my kneecaps are going to be gone by the time i hit 30. plus my back is sore and over-stretched because i arched it too much. walking around with my hand on like a pregnant woman now. lol.

today while rehearsing with my blades, i fell down. it was a rather dramatic fall and i screamed "shiiiittt!" and BOM-MED! on the floor and everyone stopped in the middle of their dance to look at me. haha. quite funny.

ohh. i burnt my arm on the hot plate during chem lab yesterday. ouch. there's a black patch on my arm now and it doesn't help that everyone who knows go, "how can anyone burn herself like that on the hot plate? hahahahahahahahaha!"

-_-"

been organising my songs today and realised that 4G isn't enough. urgh.

1:51 PM, Tuesday, February 14, 2006

i don't know if it was because of pe or dance or both, but in the pain in my arms have intensified. they're not aching anymore, they are more like paralysed! lol. can't even lift them properly. how am i going to bake the brownies later? the box says "stir fifty times with a spoon". geez. i'm so dead. you know what? even typing is a chore because i can't put my fingers on the keyboard properly. so i'm gonna say bye now.

1:58 PM, Sunday, February 12, 2006

time has already run out for me, hasn't it?

2:42 PM, Friday, February 10, 2006

my orpheus song.

don't know where you're leading me to, but i look ahead and you're still there.

there's something beautiful about how greek mythology can be this relevant to modern life.

2:20 PM, Thursday, February 09, 2006

we're starting our practices for the public performance. gotta go dig my rollerblades out of my garden shed and wipe the dust off them. that is, if i can find them in the first place. shucks. it's so scary rollerblading on stage. because you never know when you might fall and embarass yourself in front of an entire audience. and because i'm more comfortable skating on ice than on land? i can't even do a proper break with the blades without using the rubber thingy at the back! or go backwards nicely. or turn. or do anything! urgh. and what if i bring my blades to school on friday and, horrors of all horrors, realise that i forgot how to blade? sigh. stressed. :(

still addicted to online shopping. i visit imkikix and sgst like three times a day?! after telling myself that i won't buy anymore stuff online because they never look like the way i expect them to. and waiting for asos spree. the stuff there are so pretty! and painfully far away in usa.

don't know what to do with myself.

3:03 PM, Tuesday, February 07, 2006

"you can kill two birds with $98!"

lol. she cracks me up. at first i was trying my best to persuade her to go, and now, after i've finally convinced myself not to go, she's the one begging me to go with her.

-_-"

that's muah chee. haha.

2:02 PM, Thursday, February 02, 2006

went to watch i not stupid too with ailyne jesper and yingtong. if you ask me it's like paying seven dollars just to sit there and cry your eyes out.

splitting headache now. thank goodness tomorrow's thursday and then it's friday! which is basically free periods all the way we get dismissed for cross-country.

darn it's february already.

i'm too tired to bother, actually.

1:31 AM, Wednesday, February 01, 2006

visited my grandma, as we do every year. it was rather awkward at her house, because my aunt's a pastor and when we came, she was too busy entertaining her church friends to be able to entertain us. haha. so my siblings and i retreated into one of the bedrooms with my dad to chat with grandma. my old bedroom. in primary school, i used to stay at my grandma's house every june and december holiday. those were the times where days just flew by and i literally spent my time running around all day. i was fascinated at living in a flat, running in and out of the lifts, peeking through the little viewing hole(is that what you call it?) on the door for hours on end, trying to spy on the neighbours. my grandma doted on me, she would bring me along with her everywhere. it wasn't as if she had a choice though, cos' no one else was at home. visits to the wet market, the toys 'r' us at tampines mall, and i particularly remember her weekly trips to the barber to curl and dye her hair, how she would leave me to my own devices at the swings outside and i would refuse to go back because i wanted to play somemore. haha yepps. i don't know when nor why i stopped staying over. think it was after primary 5. now when she talks to me i don't even understand anything, helplessly looking at my dad hoping that he'll translate it for me. but usually he doesn't so i'll just nod and smile back at my grandma. somehow i used to understand her better when i was young. i don't know why, perhaps because she used to speak a little bit of chinese to me in the past. now she probably thinks i've grown up and have learnt to speak teochew at last. haha. like how wrong is she. sigh. this is so terrible. someday when i have time i'm gonna get ming or whoever else to teach me. that's my new year resolution! haha.

shucks, i'm actually reminiscing about my childhood. did i mention that i feel friggin' old?!